Things to do with a pencil (NO, not what you think)

So back in February on a sunny Monday morning I went to the bathroom to pull a towel out of my chest of drawers. Upon closing the thing an endless gush of water started sputtering out from behind. Sure thing the damn pipe had a leak and started flooding the bathroom, then the hall, the toilet and kitchen. After running around like a headless chicken and frantically calling British Gas for help I had the brilliant idea of sticking a pencil into the pipe which instantly stopped the water and gave me enough time to clean the entire flat. After all that mess was fixed by the friendly British Gas plumber I started thinking. What other brilliant things could a single pencil be good for? So here the ultimate list:

1. Curl up your hair, stick it in there and done - they call that a sleek up do
2. Throw it at people that annoy you. Alternatively, throw at someone you like, might just gain their attention and start a love story
3. Use it to kill blood thirsty vampires it's made of wood after all.
4. Utilize it to scratch areas on your back you wouldn't reach otherwise.
5. Find a second one and use as chopsticks - imagine that subtle taste of graphite - yummy!
6. use them as drum sticks
7. As a stick - you know, to pick up your flatmates dirty underwear from the bathroom floor (have you read yesterday's post?)
8. To play improvised dart with the whole punched ceiling
9. To build a stick man
10. Occasionally, you can use them to, like....draw something or whatever.

p.s. I was also informed that you can do the boob test with a pencil as in test whether it gets stuck which pretty much means they need, erm, a lift - who knew.